Antonyms are two words that have opposite meanings. Autoantonyms are words that are the opposites of themselves.
For example:
bill noun
invoice (e.g. in a restaurant)
money; banknote
bound adj./verb •
restrained (e.g. by rope)
to spring; leap
clip verb •
to fasten together; hold tightly
to cut apart; cut off (e.g. with shears)
handicap noun/verb •
advantage (e.g. in sport)
disadvantage; disability
wind up verb •
to start; prepare
to end; conclude
Ronald MacDonald Charged in Wendy’s Theft
Ronald MacDonald Charged With Stealing Money From Safe at N.H. Wendy’s
Ever since the dawn of professional sports, players have had nicknames. Baseball’s first great pitcher, Denton True Young, quickly earned the nickname “Cyclone,” which soon became Cy, and baseball’s top pitching award now bears his name.
Fans have always nicknamed their favorite players as a way to acknowledge them and the important place they hold in the pantheon of sports legends, as only standout players get new monikers. Those who sit on the bench by and large do not. So it is with that in mind that we salute athletes with the coolest, most unusual or most unique nicknames in professional sports.
According to Fox Sports, here are the top 10 coolests athlets nicknames:
As a result, I’ve polled 100 people to find the best “worst” answers ever given on Family Feud. The top 27 answers are on the board.
I’ve also been fascinated by how one of those five people will crack under the pressure and cost everyone else on their team a chance to walk away with $32.87.
Here are just a few:
Question: Name a musician who goes by one name.
#1 Answer: Madonna
Worst Answer: Reba McIntyre
Louie Anderson’s Response: Show me the strike.Question: Name something a woman would find in her boyfriend’s apartment that would make her think he was cheating.
#1 Answer: Bra
Worst Answer: Used condomQuestion: Name a complaint you might have about the pizza that was just delivered.
#1 Answer: It’s cold
Worst Answers: It went to the wrong address
Louie Anderson’s Response: And you just happened to be there.Question: Name the best month to schedule a wedding.
#1 Answer: June
Worst Answer: Summer
The only question on the philosophy final was:
What is courage?
The student wrote: “This”, signed the exam booklet, and turned it in.
My mother taught me LOGIC.
“If you fall off that swing and break your neck, you can’t go to the store with me.”
My mother taught me MEDICINE.
“If you don’t stop crossing your eyes, they’re going to freeze that way.”
My mother taught me TO THINK AHEAD.
“If you don’t pass your spelling test, you’ll never get a good job!”
My mother taught me ESP.
“Put your sweater on. Don’t you think I know when you’re cold?”
My mother taught me TO MEET A CHALLENGE.
”What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you. Don’t talk back to me!”
My mother taught me HUMOR.
“When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me.”
My mother taught me how to BECOME AN ADULT.
“If you don’t eat all of your vegetables, you’ll never grow up.”
My mother taught me about GENETICS.
“You are just like your father!”
My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
“Do you think you were born in a barn?”
My mother taught me about the WISDOM OF AGE.
“When you get to be my age, you will understand.”
My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
“Just wait until your father gets home.”
My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
“You are going to get it when we get home.”
And my all time favorite thing, JUSTICE.
“One day you will have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you. Then you’ll see what it’s like.”
A man staggers into an emergency room with a concussion, multiple bruises, two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat. Naturally, the doctor asks him what happened. “Well, it was like this”, said the man. “I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife, when at a difficult hole; we both sliced our balls into a pasture of cows. We went to look for them, and while I was rooting around noticed one of the cows had something white at its rear end. I walked over and lifted up the tail, and sure enough, there was a golf ball with my wife’s monogram on it–stuck right in the middle of the cow’s butt.
“That’s when I made my big mistake.”
“What did you do?” asks the doctor.
“Well, I lifted the cow’s tail and yelled to my wife, ‘Hey, this looks like yours!’ I don’t remember much after that.”
Cute.
Try counting sheep